I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
