I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
