Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
