love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize
