Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
