I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
No I am not eating basil off your cock
im calling her cock vulture from now on
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
