She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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