suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
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