Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
