is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
