You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
