He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
