you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
