sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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