If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
