Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize
