ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
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