roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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