Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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