At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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