did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
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