sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
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