I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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