TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
