we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
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