i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
