Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
