im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Well I just put wine in my tea
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
