Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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