and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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