I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
