Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
