What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Randomize
