No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
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