So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
You need Xanax blowdarts
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
