4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
