i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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