Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
