My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
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