walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize