i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I am mentally ready for anal.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
