I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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