i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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