i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Randomize
