i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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