Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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