You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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