i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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