Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
