I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
